Queasytoons

Daria is finally coming to DVD. I know you've all been waiting with baited breath.

Honestly, I find myself surprised at not giving even a tiny little shit about this. It was a fun show, back in the day, but I failed to roll over any of those feelings as relevant to who I am now.

Top YouTube results for "Daria" include the following:

[first clip deleted for being intolerably dumb]





Wow, underwhelming.

Side thought: Despite my relative maturity level, this show still presents cartoons I'd like to bone.

I had a friend in high school who was a massive fan of Daria. And also a retard*.

Seriously, a teacher once tried to get me to help him with his vocab worksheet so she could go do something else (I said no). And once I dumbfounded him by explaining that the Matrix isn't profound because I can bend a spoon with my finger, and that I can move objects with my mind by way of my hand. "That isn't how it works!" "No, look, it is. Three-dee House of Beef. Wha-woo, wha-woo." Seriously. No, and he was also retarded*, like he drooled and was in special ed and shit. And was obsessed with a movie I never caught the name of where Buddy Holly fought zombies with a katana (which, honestly, sounded cool).

Maybe that killed Daria for me.

Or maybe it was always an example of MTV's steady decline from horse-puckey into bullshit, excused at the time as the inevitable consequence of their fluke successes, of which Liquid Television, Aeon Flux, and Beavis and Butthead are unfortunately represented as precedents.

Sidebar: if They made an animation anthology, as a feature movie like Heavy Metal, every year or every other year (like James Bond!), I'd be a slave to that. And what a wonderful forum for all that good shit like what came from Liquid Television... and Heavy Metal... and to turn all that Heavy Metal and 2000AD content into cartoons. Seriously, guy... that's a movie ticket and a full-price DVD purchase from me and a half-million other dweebs, guaranteed into perpetuity.

I don't know... maybe Daria was okay. Hmm. Things to think about.

*The proprietors of Restless Natives will give Sarah Palin a quarter for every utterance of "retard" under their byline the moment she sucks a black cock.